Bears at the Beach

There was a story on the news a few nights ago about a Black Bear in Navarre. It had been going through the neighborhood garbage at night.

The nice young Lincoln Navigator driving family was surprised that the beast going through their garbage was not the Raccoon they thought, but a Black Bear. When the husband went out to check on the noise, he found a large bear on his driveway. They took photos of the Bear and called the Police.

The Game Warden was called and at the time of the story, the family was told there was nothing they could do about the bear. The terrified young woman with the two year old said "does someone have to die before they do something about this bear?".

Now, it took me about a second and a half to realize the error of their ways.

Had this happend in my backyard, there is NO DOUBT in my mind that this would be the conversation with the police department.

Sheriff's Dept: Escambia Sheriff's Dept.

My house: Yeah, I have a question, what if something has been in my garbage and when I went outside to check on some suspicious noises and I just happened to be cleaning my gun in my garage, and I live outside the city limits, near a swamp, and there was a Black Bear in my garbage and when I went outside to check on the noise, the bear lunged at me and I shot it.... It's ok for me to keep the Bear skin right?

Sheriff's Dept: Well, sir, if this happened, we will need to call the Game Warden....

My house: Oh, don't worry about it. It' really didn't happen. It was a What If question... I was just wondering ...... It was really a raccoon and I shot the kid's pellet gun and scared it off. No need to call anyone. Thank you for your time.

background voices before the phone disconnects..... Hey baby, get out there and wash the blood off the driveway. I am gonna put this bear in the freezer until I can get it to the taxidermist!

Click.